A 180 days ago, I kissed my parents at the airport with not an exact return date. The only thing I remember from my final hours in Houston were my father aka pitbull with his go pro camera… (which might as well be attached to his hand) and my mother worried that two suitcases were not enough for me to have everything I needed for a year. I have to say at the time I shared the same sentiments. However, the woman at the checkin counter… Looked at my luggage and me and said,” You’re going to Madrid”. I heard her mumble to her partner “isn’t that a bit much”. I snarled at her at said ,”well I’m moving to Madrid for a year not that it is any of your business”… So she didn’t charge me for my lbs overage. I remember thinking I am glad my crazy eyes are good for something. Then, I got on that plane and made a promise to myself once I step out British airways 12 hour flight that I was going to do everything differently. I was going to soak everything in with an open mind and more importantly an open heart.
So as I dedicated my yoga practice in class today. I realized I have made a life for myself here I can say without a doubt that I am a different person. I look at pictures and I do not recognize myself. I am sure my friends think the same.
Most importantly, what I have learned about myself is to be in the moment. I use to always have a plan. I would have nauseating conversations with myself making sure I accomplished long term and short term goals. I never allowed myself to just get lost somewhere. Or just enjoy a view, sit and relax. I am so internally grateful that I have had this time for myself. Now as I am 180 days in I hope I get one step closer to what I have been looking for. That is to trust myself. Be ok with not having a plan and appreciate the present.